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New Year's Resolutions: Worthiness is the New Beginning

Written by: Earnst Ilang-Ilang , Travel Trainer | IL Specialist 

New Year's Day is a special holiday for most people – it represents many different translations; whether it's renewal, hope, optimism, or to put it mildly, an escape from the mistakes of the previous year. I have always been fascinated with the coming of a new year, mainly due to the reasons I stated earlier, but I also get to see other's motivations and stories that they tell themselves.  The most common theme within embracing the new year is the “New Year's Resolution”.

A resolution requires resolve. It requires sacrifice, compromise, and also endurance. Those are three facets of change that I would like to focus on in this blog, because they are very important to our sense of reality and the changes we intend to implement on our lives. I have talked to many of my clients who simply gave up their resolutions whenever “life happened” – which means that there was an ‘event horizon' in the stress levels attributed to such a change. This is absolutely not meant to shame – but rather, to enlighten and help us achieve our goals and aspirations. We must differentiate between shame that we manifest within ourselves, and the shame that others inadvertently give to us. I read an amazing book by Dr. Brené Brown, a famous social worker (and storyteller) who studied shame and worthiness, and one of the biggest gifts I received from reading that book was this quote, “There are no prerequisites to worthiness. You are worthy just as you are.”
Think about that for a minute. You are worthy just as you are. This is just my opinion of course, but that is so powerful! Now let's apply to that to our resolutions shall we? I think we would be a lot kinder to ourselves if we accepted the notion that we are already worthy as is. Instead of seeking for that elusive praise that we obviously enjoy basking in, let's consider the fact that the resolution is the impetus for change. A start of something wonderful. Most of us agree with the notion that changing is hard – and it definitely is, but that is exactly why we should change for the better! A difficult situation doesn't necessarily mean that it was inherently bad, but rather, it provides us an outlet to grow.
That is my wish for you, the reader. Grow. We live in a society where the only growth that matters is the actions or behaviors that you see. However, if you can take that notion aside and consider that growth can be as small as writing something you are thankful about for 365 days. It could also be as big as the decision to quit smoking, live healthier, and to verbally appreciate those around you more. Regardless of what change you decide, make it a positive one that YOU can work towards.
There is no magic pill, routine, or drink that can change you as an individual. There is only your resolve. Your change is wholly determined by how hard you are willing to work towards change. Sometimes it doesn't happen this year, or the next, or even the next one. However, I do believe that having these resolutions is a sign of our hope – that each year can be a good one. In order to make your goals a reality, we must learn to let go, to make things right, and to keep going (sacrifice, compromise, and endurance).